wisdom tooth woe & the strained ones

**warning: long entry ahead*

It's really ironic that the person you thought you can place your trust in turns out to be the one who deceives you the most. I'm always a sucker at believing in the right people i guess! Or maybe, I'm just too forgiving in human nature and lies.

Arrg! The irony..

Anyway I've been cooping up myself in my room or either that I'm out working, studying or galivanting around the town. It feels good not to be conversing at home really. Although I know for a fact why that is so.

Because I don't feel like forgiving anymore. I don't feel like giving in anymore. I just feel like doing things I like, my rights and saying things to hurt people just like the way they hurt me.

Am I self-fish?

In school I'm still the happy-go-lucky, occasionally skiving only to be rushing and stressing through the completion of the day's project and finally heave a sigh of relief when the presentation is over. Still jokes with my mates, still talk and you know, just get the day over with. I'm enjoying day-out-and-away-from-home.

I had a consultation with the dentist yesterday evening. Went with my classmate who had a infection at her wisdom tooth site (sigh, i knew it only too well when she described her symptoms) and although I know I'm for sure to have to remove my wisdom tooth at the left lower jaw too; it just didn't occurs to me that I have to take 2 x-rays and get 2 wisdom tooth removed, the other being the left upper jaw.. Ok, so here it comes. One bad news and one good news.

The bad news is, I've got to get to a specialist for my lower jaw wisdom tooth. Apparantly it was too big, too deep and too near my nerve system that it could be dangerous if the dentist do it for me. So I've got to spend a whoopin' 700 bucks on a specialist. The good news? The upper jaw just need a mere extraction at 80 bucks, a save of $320 if I need a surgery for that!

So I've got to spend near to $900 to get these tooths off before they mess up everything in my mouth. The money is a concern, but so is the pain! I can't imagine myself getting yakked out later at the dental clinic, nor can I imagine myself not eating as much as I usually do. My mood probably gets into a roller coaster ride from all these depressing thoughts of not being able to eat my favorite food or as much as I do...