Saturday, January 17, 2009

Brand new year; same old story.

As much as we all like to act denial once in a while, things always happen so you’ll get reminded of them. I can’t imagine after all these years, I still remember your phone number, birthday by heart and there’s not a year when I’d not send you birthday wishes.

Thing is, I don’t know why I’m doing this. When you’re a total jerk from the one I knew and understand back then. Maybe we never really know each other and maybe, I was the one being such a asshole in the first place but hey, it was a struggle for me too. I’ve always wondered what’d happen if I wasn’t so bothered then.

I don’t know what to say, how to communicate to you anymore. It’s like we’ve totally lost all links. When one of my poly mates says that we ought to lament about the past before it’s too late and remember all the memories that we commonly hold before it was forgotten; i wonder if it was the case for you and me.

Notice I didn’t use the word “us”? I don’t even know if you still remember me or ever taken me seriously. If possible, I would tell you everything about all these years but no, I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t be bothered.

Somehow there’s always something ringing inside telling me I was wrong to assume and yet it’s just the way it is.

Gosh, I need a break.

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